Recently I listened to this guided meditation and found myself relaxing just listening to it. I enjoy guided meditations a lot. While I’m not religious, I do follow a path that I believe in and meditation is a big part of that. It’s been way too long since I participated in my faith. I realized it was lacking in my life by the amount of stress I was experiencing.
While I am pretty open and honest on this blog, there are a lot of things I don’t address. I have to be vague once again, and I apologize, but I’ve been feeling an intense level of dissatisfaction with my current profession. I’ve thought about going back to school for a long time, completely changing my focus and direction, but I haven’t figured out what to change to….thus, no school yet.
I firmly believe that emotional health is just as important, if not more important than, physical health. How many of us have struggled with depression or anxiety and not FELT motivated to workout? {Raises Hand} Been there. I was there for a long time. I was depressed that I’d “always” be fat and nothing would ever change. It was a vicious cycle.
Depressed over weight –> eat to feel better –> beat self up for bingeing –> feel depressed.
What I found was that exercising and eating healthy DID help and DID change things. I suddenly had more energy, more optimism, more happy feelings. Endorphins are an amazing thing. But what happens when those exercise endorphins don’t work as well anymore?
Spring Cleaning for the Soul
Spring is coming soon (thankfully) and with spring comes the “Cleaning” that I routinely want to do. I want to clean my house and get rid of STUFF. I want to clean my life and discard what doesn’t work anymore. I have clothes in my closet that don’t even fit me anymore, socks with holes in them, and people in my life who feed into the negative toxicity that I’ve been feeling lately.
Unresolved issues don’t go away and FOOD is not the answer. All too often I used food as a band-aid for hurt feelings or anger that I didn’t want to address when I did have the power to change my situation. That needs to change. It may be something I always struggle with, but I am conscious and aware of it and actively trying to change the patterns.
How Am I Doing It?
Keeping trigger foods out of the house so I don’t turn to comfort eating/bingeing in times of stress.
Look for things outside of what is causing me stress/unhappiness to make me happy. Sure I can’t necessarily change a current situation but I can look somewhere else for something that will make me happy.
Live in the moment. This one is really difficult for me because I’m a planner and I tend to think about the future instead of living in the moment.
Focus on fixing what I CAN fix. I am in control of what I eat, how much I exercise and how I spend my down time. If my environment is feeling overwhelming and cluttered, I can clean it. If my mind is feeling cluttered with “nonsense” I can try unplugging; no TV, no computer, internet break. I’m already plotting a mini weekend where I disappear without some of those things for a mental break!
What about you? What are your thoughts on this?
Carbzilla
Great post. While I still turn to food in most situations, I have found that becoming more assertive and speaking up in the moment, no matter how scary, has really helped me with a lot of other issues. I probably came off as bitchy until I was able to find a happy medium of assertion and aggression, but you know what? Bitchy never killed anyone AND it doesn’t make you fat. 🙂
It really is a language issue and takes lots of practice but once you know how to express yourself in any number of situations it becomes much easier. I’m excited about this great time of growth for you.
Lisa Eirene
This is something I need to work on. Especially at work. People take advantage of me because I’m a workhorse. I need to speak up and let them know when it’s not ok. It’s hard. And I definitely get stressed out and sometimes stress eat.
Tricia
I just quit my full time job. I was completely miserable & would worry about having to go back into work the whole weekend. I felt like a 1000 pound weight had been lifted off my shoulders when I gave my notice–I have even noticed that I am smiling again! I know how hard it is when you feel stuck in a situation, but look for unconventional means to leave a miserable job, it worked for me!
Lisa Eirene
Your comment has made me smile!! I am so proud and so happy that you did that. Leaving an unhealthy relationship or job is ideal. It’s my plan. But I have to have something else lined up before I can do that just yet…
Tricia
I actually work in the veterinary field. I have taken a part time position with another practice. I intend to supplement my income with dog walking, house sitting, etc. If you have skills that can be used to help someone else (which I believe you do!), I would definitely investigate using them. There are “gig” websites where you can get paid for writing a blurb, directions on how to use something, or other short writing projects. It is very exhilirating to leave my full time job, but I am confident that my smaller part time jobs will fill the gaps. Good luck to you!
Lisa Eirene
Thanks for the suggestions!
Roz@weightingfor50
I love this post. The term spring cleaning for the soul is great, and so important. I love Tricia’s comment about leaving a toxic job and just figuring it out. I’m a little trapped as it sounds you are, and knowing that taking the leap of faith to make a change is motivating and inspiring. Have a great day Lisa.
Lisa Eirene
Sorry you are trapped as well. You know the sad thing? I started writing this post LAST YEAR. I never finished and then wrote the rest of it yesterday. How sad is it that a year later I am still trapped. Bah humbug.
Michelle @ Eat Move Balance
I love that: “spring cleaning for the soul”. I know I could use some of that as well. Thanks, Lisa. 🙂
Trevor
Discontent poisons the soul. It’s good that you recognize it and are taking preventative measures to avoid slipping up. Very smart. I hope you’re able to get things sorted out. Clearly you’re not happy at your job. That’s a tough one to overcome though. I’ll be wishing you luck.
Cheers!
Lisa Eirene
“Discontent poisons the soul.” <---love this!
SMM
Wow. This comes at the perfect moment for me! I’m so right there and so have been there done that!
I appreciate your honesty, and I am sorry that your job is such a bummer right now. Today was beautiful though in PDX!! 🙂 (I went on my first walk in a LONG time, so this post resonates in oh so many ways for me!!)
I know that balance –social; emotional; physical; mental; professional –is the key, and I am the first to admit how hard it is to find it. I had a mini-breakdown this morning on my way to work and know that part of that is that my husband and decompressing sounding board is out of town for work; part is because I haven’t been working out and taking care of myself; part is because I have an hour commute in the morning and an hour commute in the afternoon; and the other part is I miss my family across the country.
I guess I don’t have much to offer except that you aren’t alone and I appreciate you!
Lisa Eirene
It has been pretty good weather lately! The sunshine is nice. Glad you went for a walk and enjoyed it.
The balance is hard to achieve but it’s even harder to maintain. Sometimes I do really well with the balance and then it all slips. Sorry you are in the same boat. Having someone there to listen to the venting does help. Hang in there!
Joanne
I think everyone is guilty of overeating when dealing with stress or anxiety…it’s tough to break that habit but it sounds like you have good ideas to try to stave it off!
Lisa Eirene
Trying! Reminding myself “food is not the answer.” 🙂
Miz
FANTASTIC POST.
Im right there wth you. for me the emotional is FAR MORE IMPORTANT than the physical as it feeds (oun intended) right into the physical.
Lisa Eirene
Thanks for the insight, Carla. I agree!
Biz
While I am an emotional eater, I too have to think before letting food comfort me. I stop and think “am I going to remember what’s upsetting me tomorrow, next week, or next month?” The answer is usually no, so my motto is “Water off a Ducks Back” and move on. Love the spring cleaning for the soul though! 😀
Lisa Eirene
That’s a great way to stave off a binge. Am I going to be upset about this tomorrow or next week? Good questions to ask. Hard in the moment!
Lynn B
I am so much like you it seems! I am a planner (actually an OVER-planner) to a fault, so living in the moment is something I have to remind myself of often. I am a huge fan of guided meditation and listen to Tara Brach almost daily. It has changed my life. Best of luck on you cleaning!
Lisa Eirene
Yep yep yep! I overplan and overbook and then get burned out. I have a really hard time living in the moment…always looking to the future! I’m working on that.
Jen
+1000!!!! Yes and yes on this whole post! I could have written this myself although my job isn’t the problem…it is the people I’ve let populate my life and a large dose of other peoples decisions having a direct effect on me. Just this week, I’ve decided to finally put a stop to what I can, remove the negative wherever I can, change what is realistically changeable (wanting to move) and the biggest, which you mentioned, is to just walk away from information highway when I hit overload ie all things electronic. I am so much more a peace with my head buried in a book than I ever am gorging on social media sites, etc. I rarely try to self medicate with food though…I tend to turn to wine for that which is obviously not a solution either. Sometimes when I realize that I’ve just had enough, I put myself to bed and tell myself that tomorrow is a new day Scarlett O’Hara-style! 🙂
Lisa Eirene
Thanks Jen!
I understand…and it’s great that you can eliminate the negatives from your life. That’s so important. Get rid of the emotional vampires and Negative Nancys. Of course that is harder when they are family, OR coworkers you are forced to see every day.
Jen
Don’t I know it…my biggest source of negativity does, in fact, come from a family member. I am not the best at establishing boundaries and just saying no in general but I’m working on it! 🙂
Lisa Eirene
That’s too bad. It’s hard to limit exposure to negativity when it’s a family member. Great job establishing boundaries. That’s often the hardest part.
Nick Goodall
I’m with you on the meditation, I think it’s absolutely brilliant. Although it may have been conjured up by religions, it’s nothing more than a way to find peace within yourself. Whether you’re religious or not, it helps, I’d recommend it to anyone!
I like your take on the fixing what you can fix! Taking personal responsibility is what will get you places, but I don’t even need to tell you that, you’ve been well on your way for a long time! Great stuff Lisa!
Lisa Eirene
Do you meditate? I’m trying to do it more often. Just like yoga, it’s something I may not enjoy but I always feel better once I do it!